Top Search Terms of the Week

Another week of classy searchers leave their mark on my blog! So what were the search terms this week?

1) Tranny Blogspot
2) Tranny Blogger
3) Hernia Test
4) Tranny Blog
5) Garoto de Programa
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My intention was to write a fun and entertaining blog, but it looks like I am now dabbling in the sex industry. Oh well..

Tips for getting lots of hits on your blog.

I admit it. I'm a greedy person.

That's only because I need $95,000 USD to get my investment visa. That's right, I'm not depending on any Brasileira for my permanencia. Although I'm by no means counting it out.

So, because of my trusty Google Adsense paying me a grand total of .15 cents over the past month, I've decided to recruit more readers to my blog so I get mo' money.

Pay no attention to the following words, just copy and paste them into your blog randomly because it attracts are very large group of people on the internet looking for things that probably are not on your blog (or let's hope so...)Please don't be offended!

Tranny Blogspot
Tranny Blogger
Tranny Brazil
Brasileiro Tranny
Garota de Programa Rio de Janeiro
Garoto de Programa Rio de Janeiro (!!!!) <---That was one of my top hits last week! YESSSSS!
Whore Garota

And that's it for now. Sorry to whore out my blog for a while. I will do ANYTHING for MONEY. Call me and we can arrange a meeting. 1-800-BEIJOS

Brazilians taking over New York City.

I was in New York yesterday, and it was a bea chi ful day to gat up and take the 45 minute drive north. (soooo farrrr)


Everywhere I went I heard Portuguese, of course Brazilian. I remember that I read recently that Brasileiros spend more than any other foreign visitor in New York while there. Pretty representative of what I saw I'd say...the new way to spot a Brazuca family is look what kind of shopping bags they are carrying. The obligatory shopping bag is Louis Vuitton. Most likely they will hold that in the same hand as their Tiffany, Cartier and Mikkimoto bags. On the other arm is their 2 year old stereotypically un-Brazilian looking child being a little whiny, but nothing revolutionary.

I bet most Americans confuse them to be Italian. 

Too bad I didn't strike up conversation with any of them. I have this weird thing where I get nervous around random Brasileiros because I'm afraid I'll forget a word or something in Portuguese. I guess its time for me to grow some balls.

1,000 Views!

Thank you guys for reading my blog! I have over 1,000 hits in a little more than a month! I'm considering it a success as of now! Hopefully I can keep this up....

Anyway, I LOVE MY READERS, AND THANKS FOR TAKING THE TIME TO READ MY CRAZY ANTICS!

Hello, I work @ the Prostitution Palace! =)

As most of you know, prostitution is illegal in the United States. That doesn't stop anyone though inlcuding yours truly (just kidding....well...only when I want money for my Brasil fund....)!

                                                                    Deborah Secco as Bruna Surfistinha! Quer um cigarro?

But as a part of my internship that has been ravaging my life for the past three weeks, I get to work at the front desk of a well known hotel in the area. It's amazing how blatant they are.

Garota de Programa 1 - around 20 years old, brunette, mildly good looking. What a shame, becuase she came back down those elevators in 30 minutes tops. That seemed a little fast.

Garota de Programa 2- around 65 years old (I'm not kidding!) and wrinkly as any weather worn BocaBabe you've ever seen. This was disturbing, because she was up there for a  while longer, possibly an hour and a half.

The dead giveaway to the whole scheme was when two sweaty, overweight, middle aged men came walking down to the front desk and told us they would like to check out. One of them was in the suite that costs $499 per night on the weekdays.

Ewwwwwww. 

So, this is the perfect time to give you my offer: My rate is $25 an hour, and you don't pay if you don't like it. Oh yeah, and I'm a virgin too. Tack on another $25 on the grand total for that. Call me @ 1-800 LOVE ME LONG TIME or email me at bossabreezesinyourcrotch@programa.com. Thanks!

Graduation Season....

Tis the season...to have your wallet drained!

Yes that's right, it's graduation season here in the US. Everyone I know is either graduating from High School or College, and let me tell you, it's getting quite expensive. In the town I live in, things are quite competitive. Unfortunately this translates into having to give everyone you know who's graduating from High School at least $100. College is a whole different, expensive animal.

Hey, I guess I have to look at it on the bright side....when I graduate the money will be pooling in! More money for my Brasil fund!

Anyway I hope you all have a great weekend! Tomorrow is Father's day, which means quality family time. When's father's day in Brasil again?

Beijos !

My Addiction.....The Cheesecake Factory

I'm an addict. I'm addicted to the Cheesecake Factory. Those of you who live in the United States are well aware of this place. Only problem here is that each time I sit down there I eat probably close to the amount of calories that are supposed to be spread out in a week.....IN AN HOUR AND A HALF! This place is good, but I have a love hate relationship with it. Every time I leave that place I feel strange tinglings in my left arm, and feel physically bogged down. The next day too. I honestly am starting to think I need another addiction to sway my unhealthy caloric intake in the other direction....so, I'm wondering what you all suggest: Heroine or Cocaine?

BUT, watch out international readers! It looks like the Cheesecake Factory is staging their world domination scheme, and may end up in a suburban/urban sprawly location near you! They are in the process of setting up shop in Dubai and Kuwait. Is Brasil next in line for 3,000 calorie slices of cheesecake and 1,500 balls of fried cheese? Vamos ver....
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I Have another random question for you pro bloggers: How do you get your blog to show up when you search for it in Google? When I search "Bossa Breezes Blog" all that comes up is...nothing to do with the blog...and a comment or two that I left on Rachel's blog. Anyone have any clues?

Bizarre Foods: Rio de Janeiro

I just got finished watching the newest Bizarre Foods with Andrew Zimmern. I have to say I usually love this show, but was extremely disappointed with this episode. Out of a show that runs, lets say, 50 minutes, I would estimate that 37 of those minutes were set in Favelas. They had a full 10 minute documentary about Rocinha, and then spent another segment in Pavao-Pavaozinho. They spent 3 minutes in Ipanema (only on the beach) and then headed to Zona Norte. THEY COMPLETELY FORGOT ABOUT ZONA SUL, ZONA OESTE and CENTRO. They could have gone to Santa Teresa too, but no. Here in the US the only thing they want to show us about Brasil is the poverty and violence. This bugs me to no end because I know that there is so much more than just this to show. Ughh sorry about my rant. I'm just a little frustrated.